Prayer for Exams

This is a prayer to St. Joseph of Cupertino. It is a miraculous prayer that helped me through my exams. I was guided in such a way that it was what i had read that came out in the exams. This is a beautiful prayer and i want to share it with all of you. No matter your religions, in time of need (esp exams), this prayer will help you through it.

There are two variants to this prayer:-

First Prayer
O Great St. Joseph of Cupertino who while on earth did obtain from God the grace to be asked at your examination only the questions you knew, obtain for me a like favour in the examinations for which I am now preparing. In return I promise to make you known and cause you to be invoked.
Through Christ our Lord.
St. Joseph of Cupertino, Pray for us.
Amen.

Second Prayer
O St. Joseph of Cupertino who by your prayer obtained from God to be asked at your examination, the only preposition you knew. Grant that I may like you succeed in the (here mention the name of Examination eg. History paper I ) examination.
In return I promise to make you known and cause you to be invoked.
O St. Joseph of Cupertino pray for me
O Holy Ghost enlighten me
Our Lady of Good Studies pray for me
Sacred Head of Jesus, Seat of divine wisdom, enlighten me.

THANK ST. JOSEPH OF CUPERTINO AT THE END OF YOUR EXAMS AND SPREAD THIS PRAYER TO ALL.

Another prayer that was amazing for me during my exams and always is the prayer to the holy spirit:-

PRAYER TO THE HOLY SPIRIT
Holy Spirit, you who makes me see every-thing and who shows me the way to reach my ideals, you who gives me the Divine gift to forgive and forget all that is done to me, and you who are in all the instincts of my life with me, I in this short dialogue, want to thank you for everything and affirm once more that I never want to be separated from you, no matter how great the material desires may be. I want to be with you and my loved ones in their perpetual glory. To that end and submitting to God's holy will, I ask from you..... etc. (your request).
(This prayer should be said for 3 consecutive days. After the 3rd day the request will be granted. While making this request should:-
Promise to publish it on granting of the prayer.

You should always remember to give thanks to God for every blessing you get in your life.

Hope this helps.

Benny Lava Meets Char Siew and Siuk Yuk

My latest cooking fun. I can't cook everything but i like to try. If it jadi goood. I float into my little proud bubble when i accomplish something. Hehe. I always tell ppl it's easy to make this and that. Not because i'm a cocky bitch. But simply because it is simple and i don't think ppl should be impressed by any dish. For those who don't cook.. it may look amazing.. but if they tried it i'm sure they could make it to. Trust me. Who doesn't know how to mix A with B and to dust C on D. Baking on the other hand is something that needs skills and patience. I ain't the best at that because i'm a lazy fart. I use no measurements and weighing scales and i can't wait ages for things to puff and poof in the oven at a lower temperature. I rather whack it on high. BUt i think i should learn.

Enough mumbo jumbo. Recently, i craved for char siew and siu yuk. Best siew yuk in Manchester is in Happy Season but i am in Wigan. So well, if you can't get something, you gotta try making it urself. Best char siew will always be at Jalan Alor in Malaysia. and there is nothing like having some nice fresh chilli garlic ginger vinegar thing they do in Malaysia. So, after a visit to kuali.com and random other websites. i set off on my adventure. The results :-

It was yummy. So I think it was a success.

Will work on it and benny lava shall cook for u guys one day.

*****muacks!!!*****

Goooooooooooooood morning

It's Thursday. Almost the end of the week. Looking forward to a weekend of blissful shopping.

Someone's drilling in my flat (Brill!!!) or near it but i can hear it so distinctively.

Like a happy child looking for candy in the morning, i stumbled into my kitchen to have a delicious cold bowl of Kellogg's Frosties (craving of the week). Engrossed in my yummy treat unaware my flatmate joined me in the kitchen.... in what i assume was his seluar dalam and a top. We're not talking boxers. We're talking proper tighty seluar dalam.

Trying to look everywhere but there whilst we chatted over breakfast. It felt as if i floated in my little pink bubble with rainbows on either side to have my frosty yummy Kellogg's Frosties and was ambushed!

KA BA BOOM

Now that's the second boy in my life to have a conversation on his underwear with me. The first was a consultant in a changing room. Is this what all male doctors do? Would not like to be caught in this situation with Ray Ming or Jay. Although that there is a high possibility after a few drinks Ray may make an appeareance. Oh well.

Finally excused myself and went into my room. this is my first time having a male housemate. time to get used to it!

---------Scents and Sensuality---------

5 senses in the body. All important but there is one i absolutely love. Smell.

Smell is able to trigger a memory for me. I adore perfume and always stick to a few fragrances.

Ever have someone (guy/girl) walk past you and fill ur nostrils with a delicious smell (not the b.o)?

or ever have someone say " you smell good, what do u use?"

Or in the case of a certain someone (a guy!)

another guy come up to him and say

" you smell nice, what aftershave is that?"

he answers flirtatiously

" nothing"

LOL!

*you know who you are*

Scents can draw you towards someone or make you run the 100m dash away from that person. One very important factor in a man for me is rich manly aftershave... mmmm. Of course, for those of you nursing 3 hairs on ur chin, shaving will be something you can look forward to in the future.

There is an experience which i enjoy. Probably most people are not aware of it. The main sites for a lady to apply perfume are neck, wrists, and behind the ears. After wearing a particular perfume for a while you get adjusted to it and are no longer aware of the smell. There is an experience that will cause a burst of all these scents. An experience most of you may not even notice and take for granted which i adore. When you shower and the water hits the spot where the perfume was on you neck, it cause a little burst of scents that is absolutely marvelous! These are the little moments of joy in my mundane daily life.. my showers. (for those of you who think i'm insane ..l..) (you know u want to try it!)

There are a few perfumes i love and use which you wouldn't have noticed in the stores and some pretty commonly seen:-

Ja'dore by DIOR

Esencia Femme by Loewe

Loewe's Quizas Quizas Quizas

DKNY - Cashmere Mist

Loewe - I Loewe You

These are just some little scents and smells in my everyday life that make my mornings a little brighter, my showers a little more exciting and my nights a little more *wink*. These are the regulars which are always on my dresser. So the next time ur around me, try and make a guess which one of these it is. Or, the next time ur stumped on what to get me for a gift, you'd never go wrong with any one of these.

I can't believe i blogged about my perfume and shower adventures. Strangely enough, i want to publish this post despite being mildly unsettled about what a loony people are gonna think i am.

My anatomy is a Croc of Shit

Once again as a deer caught in headlights, I am wide eyed with nothing between my ears. Post take ward round. Was asked what would be obstructed in a caecaltumour ( i probably can't spell that along with my croc of shit anatomy). I said " ileo caecal valve" fair enough right?

Then she asked me where that was. " Large bowel" doing not too shabby so far. Then, point on urself. Like a blitthering idiot, i pointed to my LIF. (slap me now!) Why do i turn into such a spaz when put on the spot by my assessing consultant? Well, maybe because i lack the knowledge right? Perhaps? But then, she asked me to sketch it out. .... During the ward round with the whole team looking at me. I am able to draw it correctly! (well sorta, it was mean't to look a bit more ball like) Now why couldn't i come up wit the answers before. Who knows? it's a great mystery like the riddle of the SPhiNx.

I need to make an impression and i am tripping on my own toes.

Went to theatre in an effort to prove to her i am making an effort to learn. I also wanted to ! Went to theatre with Mr. LOga (Anatomy 101 tutorial man!!). Mid way through first patient. i faint.

I know i have blogged about this before

My fainting

Is it normal?

Do i need a CT brain?

It's like all the time

1.Ward ROunds

2. Surgery

3. washing my hair.

I noticed it has something to do with warm environments. Like when the theatre lights are vasodilating my cerebral vessels or when the warm water is too much.

Why doesn't everyone have the same problem then? Why is it just me.

If i do have some strange condition. I would like to be studied and a case study done and i would like my own name on the publication please. ANy takers?

Funny Thing Happened During the Walk Down the Corridor

" Keling " ""Keling" " Keling " echos the sound or namecalling ever so familiar in Malaysia. Whilst in the other parts of the word, it will make no sense. In Malaysia (and potentially Singapore) it does make sense.

It is a term potentially initiated by 20th century Malaysians as a form of name calling towards the Indians. This originated from the anklet which is worn by Bharatanatyam (the classical indian dance). It is actually far more complicated than the anklet. Heavy indian dancing jewelery and attire as worn by Aishwarya Rai below:-

The anklet in detail.

In todays modern world, there are a variety on anklet available in the market worn by chinese, malays and indians in Malaysia. These anklets are very simple and plain made of white gold, stainless steel and silver. Well, personally i like the very very simple ones with the tiniest bell.

Something inside of me stirred ... My indian gene. Sudden craving for indian jewelry. I contemplated piercing my nose and having a tiny diamond stud on it. (not the freak show weighing down your nose type and enough to replace the sun type seen all over Masjid India) The other indian craving i had was for an anklet.

Surprisingly, there are no anklets in the UK. Well, at least i never stumbled upon them. Not even Tiffany's!!!

True to my indian roots, i now am decked in a thin white gold anklet with the tiniest bell!

I'm elated. I never take it off ... well, that's for the moment.

One question in mind... are children more aware of the sound of a little bell compared to adults?

Walking back home from hospital down the corridors of the infirmary with the faintest tinkle of my bell....

I saw the most adorable child walking down the corridor. You know the really young little boy who has just learned to walk. Has a broad based gait with the arms sticking out at the sides plodding his way down the corridor. Committed to walking on his own alongside his dad.

I stopped to the side to make way for him and also to adore this gorgeous child. He walks by me and i continue my journey in the opposite direction.

funny thing - i hypothesized in my head that the child would be attracted to the sound to the bell. Maybe it is because he is so tiny he is closer to my ankle and he hears it better.

Sure enough, when i turned around... this little pudgy broad base kiddy had turned around and was walking towards me!!!!

awwwwwwwwww..... then his father led him in the right direction and i went on home to get back to my studies.

The End.

P/S : Mine is not the heavy duty ones. Not planning to break out into a dance in the street but simple. plain. tasteful.

Good Friday : Celebration of the Passion of the Lord

It is but an unexplainable feeling you get once you walk out of church after mass. No words can describe it. You feel renewed, less burdened and afresh. You feel enriched and alive. There is no other feeling so beautiful in it's purity of spirit and mind.

The priest spoke today about the cross and the crucifx and symbols representing christianity.

In the olden times, the common punishment was to nail one to the cross and have them hang there. As Christ suffered on the cross, it is a little thing we can do just to wear the cross around our neck. The symbol of the Christian church is seen as the cross on the building.

This form of punishment by nailing one to the cross was abolished in 337 AD.

Have you ever stopped to think about what the symbol of Christianity was before the crucifixation of Christ on the cross?

It was the fish. And why was this?

One of the first reasons was the link between the mention of fish in numerous passages of the bible. Another reason was due to the Greek word for fish which is Ichthus spelt

"lota Chi Theta Upsilon Sigma"

which has many transalations in English one being

"Jesus, Son of God, Saviour"

Well, this is just a little bit of Christian history i have come to learn about today.

Have a Blessed Easter everyone

xoxo

Well, as everyone knows, my blog has little bursts of life and then dies off for ages.The reason for thiswhy blog when u can be out having fun.Last blog post dates somewhere in July. It is now March 2008.In these couple of months, numerous thoughts have floated through my head. The key word here being floated. Like jokes, i can never keep a thought/joke long enough in my head to express it to the world.

Currently, following Malaysian Dreamgirl.My personal opinion is that the ultimate judge for such a contest should be a reknown sexy plastic surgeon.Speaking of surgeons, Wednesday morning surgical audit meetings are delish!Currently doing Colorectal surgery. Becoming an expert at the Surgical Abdomen! (no kidding!)

Been travelling a bit in the span of these few months,

London

Paris

Venice.

wow.. Venice.. that was quite an adventure... right??? (those of you who survived it with me!!!)

Speaking of London, stayed at the very special hotel Tatiano. Best place in London by far. Who could want a better host *wink*The manager owner of this lovely apartment a stone's throw from the London eye is none other than ...

Kim Tat - suited Superman!

Belgo.. miss u! mango beers and po pei .. ( dun spell it, just eat it baby)

An adorable little girl on my eurostar to Paris.

Love kids.

Currently, in a situation where i've got to spend more time at home than out. Lots of work to catch up on. Looking forward to next weekend. Lake district, Blackpool weekend. Vomit bag, my best friend. The injury i cause myself in the name of insane fun. *raised brows*

This weekend quest:-

1. cocktails at Socio Rehab

2. tea sweetened with Black Cherries.

3. Shopping (this is like a routine at weekends)

4. and i think there's a movie i am to be dragged to bribed with cheesy food which i will do or else. (sobs)

Frustrated and ANnoyed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Again an angry post venting my frustrations which you have never seen on my face. Always hidden behind a smile and a giggle. Something set me off now.. to go on about this. It's 9 something in the morning and i am bloody blogging.
Anyway, i'm annoyed with so many things. Mainly the actions of others. I"m lazy to discuss this here.
Moving on to something else.
I am a sentimental fool
I am really
I cherish and keep small little things
I have certain things i reserve for sharing with certain people
Some things only for my family
I really keep a lot of things and there is meaning to so many things i own.
If something not as pleasant has happened to something i love, i somehow see it very differently and will actually throw it away and buy a new one. I throw away absolutely anything irregardless of the price because the sentimental value of it is affected or tainted.
Do YOU do that too? Maybe not to such an extreme extent but i am sure somewhere and somehow you have a few sweet little things that are just special and u love them so much u don't use them
make sense? No? call me on 0780 968 5163
* one digit is off ok! not gonna give out no like that
haahha

Back once again

Hi everyone? time to resuscitate this blog again. i suck at blogging ... y even bother. but shit bored so fine.

a lot has happened lately. I thank God for the miracles He has done.

i've been to prague.

i think i have "knight's move" thinking. I always jump from one thought to another

it makes sense to me but to whomever's talking to me it's like... "whoa, what????"

it's even more evident in my writing. Doing research now... writing a paper and did a powerpoint presentation, got exactly the same comment, you're jumping from here to there.! uh - oh scary

well anyway here's picccs

MahJong

you've seen it, you've heard and and yes i've played it!!~!~!~!~!~!

never did the mahjong room of circus casino expect to see an indian girl mah -jonging there...

thanks to cmingo, his patience and brilliant teaching skills, i've learned the game and had quite a bit of fun playing it.

it's rather bitchy to do this but i just gotta..

hahahah "I BeaT my TeaCher!!"

I won 2 games..weee.. i'm not fully clear on the calculation but catching on pretty quick.

But i owe it to my gooooood gooooood teacher CmIngo...

The rest of my day revolved a lot around parking my car. Yesterday was the day of the progress test (yeah it's yday dy since it's 4.17am and i'm just showered back and tucked into my bed blogging). I drove to Uni for the exam and decided to pay and park at the Aquatics Centre as instead of parking for free in Tai Pan coz i feared my paranoia of getting caught for doing that would nag me. (i'm tired there are gonna be a lot of typo's in this blog post)

So, i am all set looking for parking at NCP Aquatic Centre. After the first few floors i was still alright thinking that i could possibly get one at the higher floors. By the time i was almost to the top there was an area for "University Only". Did i fall under that category?? i dunno. I just went on up. As i tried to come back down because the upper levels were full as well ( maybe i was delusional but i think there was about 12 floors), I was suddenly forced to stop. There was a barrier and i suddenly started panicking that only a specific university parking card (which i don't own) will lift it. *sweat*stress*palpitations* Then , still approached the barrier and thought i could buzz whoever was on the other side of the intercom to help me out. Amazingly, as i approached the barrier, it lifted *phew*!!!!

Then, i just made my way outta the aquatics centre parking and settled for Tai Pan. As i drove into the Tai Pan parking lot, the parking guy who is always there looked at me and i panicked and fleeeeeeeeeeeeed (chicken !!!)

After a phone call i came to know about parking lots next to MRI and parked there. Then, i headed for the exams.

After the exams....

We went for dinner to tai wu. I misplaced my parking ticket. Eng tat found it. (thanks eng tat!@@!!!) and soon i was on the roads again no longer trapped in parking lots.

Seriously, parking lots are out to trap me and MisS Poh. (you know who Miss Poh is... don't you?)

OK, NOW I AM REALLY LAZY AND DROWSY AND TIRED. SO BYE BLOGGY AND BLOGGY READERS.

i'm annoYed By tHis FeeLing

u know when u study, there are moments and times where everything is just flying into your head. Then, there is the times where, you wide awake, alert but just can't concentrate. You read a sentence 3 times and finally get it and someone asks u about it in 5 mins and you can't remember. I have been studying Orthopedics. Yes, carpal tunnel and tennis elbow but all the other stuff is driving me crazy. I have so much left to do

i have

psychiaty

paeds

obs and gynae

get thru medical sch book

past year q's

The time right now is 2.48pm. I have to go to morissons and get lunch or else i will mati kebuluran. Exam is tomorrow at 2pm. I have less than 24 hours to get all of this done. I hope my mind will become a super sucking sponge by the time i get back.

I'm watching Season 1 of Desperate Housewives as I study.

I have to give up coffee.. coz i usually do so 24 hours before and exam. So it's a juicy life for me.. i've got apple mango which is delicious and pink grapefruit which is something that will kick start my engines.

I'm craving for wild grain rice and something, gonna scout the microwave food section of morrisons. I can't eat any more pasta, i may give birth to an italian.

I just wish i could get a great big hug and be told that don't worry you can do it.

I trust God to help me through this Progress Test.

"I Trust in You, O Lord"

Random Ramblings!~

Well, the weekend was brill!!! (feel like i'm writing a "karangan").

I'm stressed out about having to go in all the time for ssc, write my report and study for the progress test!

I have to go to London soon, my passport needs some sorting out! I wanna try the bayswater duck! Lets all go.. make a great weekend of it! try to top last weekend!

I'm learning so much in urology. Did you know about AUS.
it is the Artificial Ureteric Sphincter.
It's a like device involving 3 pieces. The first is a little ring around the urethra with a balloon on it that can fill up with water to create the right bit of pressure to seal the urethra or open it up!! (the sphincter!)
The next is the bit which is a little tiny water filled ball which acts as a reservoir! and then there is a bit with a ittle press button for u to pump water into the balloon at the ring around the sphinter or push another button to drain it into the reservoir to allow u to wee! Isn't that so cool!!! it's a brilliant thing for those with incompetent sphincters! Goodbye incontinence hellow dry land! so simple system.


More medical facts. Did u know that one could get an angina without a stenosis of a coronary vessel or a thrombus or a plaque? it's just syndrome x where there is angina in the presence of no angiographic abnormality!

I've been having such hectic days. I sleep by 12 plus. Up by 7. Into hospital. Back at 6 and the cycle goes on. There's a part of me that can't wait for the weekend but also knows that when the weekend comes, that means it's only a week to my exam
oh well.

Golf + Shopping

For years my father has been trying to get me interested in golf. Ever since i was a little girl. My father loves the game. He made me a member of the clubs, got a pro to coach and got me all the shoes and clubs and all. I learned the game and liked it. It's been such a long time since i held a golf club in my had. Up until yesterday...

I came to know about Play Golf this driving range just 10 mins from my place! To celebrate post osce, i went to the driving range and really got into it. Love it and can't wait to go back again. It's just so much fun. My father is thrilled about my renewed interest in it and is urging me to buy all the equipment here all over again although i have em back in Malaysia!!!

After that i went to the Trafford Centre! It was time for shopping and eating! Another visit to Carluccios... ( it's this new italian cafe in the Trafford Centre which i keep buying cakes and tarts from ). I am not getting fat though!!! (JeaLous???) hrmm, maybe i am getting fat...

Anyway, the i shopped... Haven't been shopping much lately, my latest purchases:-

1. the latest shade of the Dior Addict Ultra Gloss Reflect

2. the latest MAC liquid foundation - Mineralize Satin Finish

3. La Senza Pj's! nice and comfy. i feel like i'm sleeping on air

I am not contented yet. There is much more shopping to come.

Night night folks. Stay tuned for more tomorrow!

A Twisted Knot in My Stomach

I have been having this issue for such a long time. It's really eating me inside. I want to get away from it but it seems like there isn't much i can do. It may require a personality overhaul but am i ready to do that. AND, am i capable of doing it after not having done it for so long. No one knows about this but one whom i share it with. That person can't help me and i am not helping myself. I need a change. i need to do something about it. I feel like it's really EATING ME INSIDE. Sometimes i am free of it and it is bliss but then at a certain point in time it strikes me down. I can and must overcome this. I must not look back i must push through full throttle. Blogging does help, i don't pour it out but somehow it helps. I can tell no one. No one will understand but a few and no one will believe. There will be scepticism and betrayal. I don't think any of you will be able to make sense of this but it is but what has made me feel down today and in need of some cheering up. Thanks all of you who were such good frens to comfort me!

i love this song!!!!

Please go to the bottom of the page and play the Youtube video! this song is lovely.

Is it Just me?

I have strange body physiology. Is it just me or is everyone the same? Well, i have something to confesss. I go through stages and periods in my life when i am "high" without the well know liquid beverage to be blamed (alcohol!!!!) I am serious. I don't know why, i'm just "high" with no alcohol influence !
1.The typical charlene "high" (the most common one encountered)
* very very friendly, very chatty, not reserved at all, just all my true colours (good & bad) streaming out. Laughing like a maniac, a short attention span and just talking and talking and talking. . . (pretty loudly at times - yesterday haha the guy at the table behind my friends and i was turning over to look at us a lot). When the "high" has subsided, i am then left all "oh goodness, did i really act like that? what will they think of me now? and then i apologize profusely to those people with a text the morning after which they would probably look at and go "huh? what the hell?" the other things i ask myself are did i say that? how embrassing! they typical regrets!*

2.the paranoid charlene "high"
* this is when i can overly paranoid about something. this is like when i know i have done something, and i check whether i have done and confirm that and still keep checking. Like for instance. When i park my car, if it is in my flat area, it's fine. I will just go check if i locked it. If it is at the area outside where the main road is at a slope behind it, i check it a gazzillion times. things i check for :-

1. are my doors locked + my booth

2. is the red light blinking

3. is my steering lock on

4. is my handbrake securely up? (you see, i have this phobia that if not my car will roll down onto the main road)

5. there are no visible valuables displaying (no wallets left or gps navigation equipment lying around)

and after i've done all of that i go in and will still come out and peek again to ensure the car hasn't rolled down.

You see??? this is not normal... well, not to scare you off but that's on my extreme days.

3. the third type of "high" - the i'm sleepy so i'm high

well, this one normally happens when i'm really really tired and it occurs in the night. I will be cranky and extremely anxious about a lot of things, i will think too much and worry unnecessarily about things which when i wake up and think about i myself look back and think i was ridiculously crazy. here's i'll be thinking and replaying events in the day/over the past while and thinking and over analysing and seeing if i hurt anyone and will they be upset and think are they mad at me? do they think i'm a bitch? and seriously, in the morning, not a single one of those thoughts make the least sense to me.

4. the i'm going to pour my heart out to you "high"

Just like anyone else, i have a lot in me which i keep to myself. (seems like a shock to you huh?) There is not one person who knows everything about me. But sometimes when i'm "high" i will just get comfortable with someone and just open up a lot and pour on and on about anything that is bothering me which i usually keep to myself and not share with anyone. Those of you who know me will know that i am most probably the least confrontational person you will meet. If i am upset with someone or someone hurts me, i will not react to that person but instead just let it go and no longer will be around that person. Avoidance?Well, back to the point, at this "high" i do sometimes just pour out all this to someone. and then, i will look back and think "oh no, i shouldn't have done that" and like what was i thinking . Oh no!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah, so as you can see, i have a real bunch of strange traits. I guess that it what makes me me. Is this just me? Or is everyone some what like this to a certain extent? Any views?
(i'm sure there are a lot of typo's throughout this post. I can't be bothered to go through it. My english is not awful ok!)

-~~~~~YOU~~~~~~-

You...

Are the one always by my side

are to one who comforts me when i'm down

who protects from the rough ways of this world

hits me like a storm

You....

are the one who picks me up when i have fallen

the one who stands up for me when i can't

the one who opens my eyes to so much

You

Are the one

*the wise words of someone*

Times Have Changed

In this past 2 years i think i have grown a lot. I do not know if it is for the best or for the worse. I have always been by nature known as caring and oversensitive. But so many things have happened over the past 2 years and the people i am exposed to has reshaped my character so much. I don't like the person i have become and long to be my normal self but in life it's so difficult to be that way.
I look back at a simpler time when people were genuine and sincere. In my whole life i always thought of a lot of people as friends but now i look at things differently. i have friends and then there are acquaintances. This is something my father always thought me since i was young.
He also thought me to trust no one. And up till today, there is no one in my life i trust completely besides my father and my mother. Everyone else in life has the potential to hurt you and to "use & abuse" you. *quoted from the brilliant See Lina* haha
As time goes by i do realize that my good qualities are being burried deeper and deeper within me and the cold ice queen is visible outside. Haha, but this FACADE never lasts for long, there are bursts of my normal self coming out from time to time.
For those of you who know me so well for so many years, i am still the same to you and you won't see this side of me. But, somehow , with each passing day, i am indeed changing, i don't know it is for better or for worse of it is what is called "growing up" and realizing this is the world we live in today, but it is all happening.

First night i Slept in my Scrubs

Well, i had a beautiful day today. It is all because of the way it started. It all started yesterday evening in the labour ward. I was on-call last night and was anxiously waiting for a delivery. I didn't have my bleep on me. I needed to rest because i had Antenatal CLinic in the morning. In my desperation i crawled into my covers in my "gorgeous" hospital accomodation with my room phone by my ear waiting for a call. All night.. i couldn't sleep. You know.. the feeling when you know that you have to be up at any minute. And then the most beautiful thing happen. At 8 am ... after a full nights rest i was called into the Labour Ward to start my day with a birth. It was beautiful.
I realized how previledged i am to be a witness of the great miracle that is childbirth. Really starting to enjoy my obs and gynae posting. The teaching i am getting here is excellent.
and my day carried on with all these pregnant women.. this is really a beautiful field of medicine.